My Roots - My Struggle through the Mud!

I spent my childhood in a SMALL, town called "Fort Valley, VA" ~ where I attended a unique, 2-room elementary school (which had between 2-10 people per grade!!!!).

Like many of us, my parents had some unresolved 'issues' due to life events, tragedies, etc. and I spent most of my childhood / life figuring out who "I" am / was.

My parents were 'older', when I was born (3/16/83). (My mother was 39 and my father was 52!) I guess you could say I was the 'Last Chance' child of my parents, as they both were previously married with other (older) children. They 'separated' when I was a baby and I spent my adolescent life bouncing back and forth between my parents / school systems.

My father, Dale Jett was born on 3/8/31 and was a hardworking, country, stubborn man. He lived his whole life (77 years) in Fort Valley, VA. (He chose to quit school when he was in 8th grade to spend his time, hunting, fishing and worked for a chemical company for 20+ years.) He retired when I was born and was a veteran of the Korean War. He was extremely 'old fashioned' and believed that "a woman's place was in the home" (cooking, cleaning, canning vegetables, etc.), which he had 'programmed' me to believe. He had many unfortunate circumstances in his life, including 2 of his daughters from his previous marriage were killed in separate car accidents as teenagers, let-alone the many disturbing circumstances of being in war. He passed away Nov. '08.

My mother, Linda (Marshall / Carlson/ Jett/) Haborn was born on 8/9/44. She was born in RI and resided in CT. She was unfortunately tormented by the anguish of losing her mother, a week after being born. She chose to run, escape from life in various, destructive ways.

As a child, I HATED my life (I felt that I was robbed from having a childhood). I was not allowed to have friends and was pretty much 'sheltered' from the outside world, where I received emotional and often physical abuse from my mother. Now, looking back ~ I don't agree with the torment, upbringing that my parents subjected me to, but I have chosen to 'forgive' them and will always 'love' them.

Forgiveness is what is needed in order to obtain / feel 'love'. I've learned that you have forgive yourself and others for the PAST in order to 'heal' / 'love' NOW.

Holding onto negative emotions such Guilt, Anger, and Resentment will manifest itself into physical health problems and create chaos in life - while also blocking your ability to send and receive 'love'.

I admit that I have made many mistakes in my life and am constantly learning lifes lessons / evolving. One of my favorite quotes has been "What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger and Wiser".